Guest Post by: Maria Dowd
I’m finally going to write on a hair topic. As a distributor of a professional hair care products line and wife of a 38-year hair styling veteran, I’m overdue. Last week I had crazy discussion about hair. A woman asked for my input about styling her hair, then proceeded to shut me down because I had a “better’ texture than she and therefore couldn’t relate to her plight. Our hair textures looked about the same to me. She simply needed more moisture and something to define her curl pattern. The feedback was simple and I gave her some samples to help. However, the dialogue turned into something uglier and sadder. She was clear that my hair was “better” than hers so I wasn’t qualified to give any advice, although I was asked for it. Insane, right? The “good hair/bad hair” madness continues…both inside and outside of hair salons. Still too many of us are exceedingly hyper-critical of the texture of our locks, even while carrying the naturalista banner of liberation.
It’s my humble opinion that women lose their sensibilities and hairlines over “good” hair, “bad” hair hang-ups, that are passed along from generation to generation to generation. There is no wonder why edge control products outsell every other product, like 15 to 1. We’re so self-conscious of that little upturned curl, that we’ll brush, gel and pull it back into non-existence. Then, turn to our 2-year old daughters, and do the same causing (incurable) tension alopecia – e.g. bald-headed edges.
Let’s just relax, embrace that upturned or coiled up strand and keep life moving forward and upward. Truth be told, nobody really notices or cares that much about how straight your edges are not, unless they roll with the same hang-ups. Self-identified “Bad Hair Gurls” may be focusing too much on what’s not “right” about their hair, that they can’t hear some possible great feedback on what’s possible with their natural curls and coils…even from supposed “Good Hair Gurls.” Without guidance and experimentations with product cocktails, just the right amount of moisture, sheen and hold, my hair knots up, shrinks and “fro-fros” with the best of ‘em. While I could be considered a 3c or 4a-ish, depending upon which low resolution photos I’m looking at, on a low moisture, low definition, high frizz day, I can easily play with the 4b Gurls – based which fuzzy photos of fuzzy hair I’m looking at.
All curls are created equal.
Rather than judging and boxing our hair into subjective, wavering categories, let’s just enjoy what God gave us and play with it, and relish in the journey of discovering what works best for the moment and the look you want to achieve.The bottom line is – an afro will be an afro if we’re not manipulating our curls and coils with moisturizing and curl-defining hair care product, fingers, tool and possibly some heat. And, it starts, ends, curls and coils all around that thing called mindset.
